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Showing posts from 2011

You explode.

At times there is this situation when you blame it on the fate, It's that moment when you don't get that shot that great, When you try too hard and it all falls apart, Each thing that you've worked for seems a little dark, When all things you do seem meaningless, When you feel empty and tired and feelingless, A moment arises when you start feeling anger, That anger when you control you make things worse, You make yourself a pressure cooker and get ready to explode, Everyone does their own work and so do you, You look around and frown and still can't scream out loud, You feel you're captured in the depths of your being, You feel so heavy that you can't really breathe, And then one fine day when you just can't take it, You need a way out and vent it, You explode coz that is your breaking point.

That Part of my Past.

Each time I feel that everything has ended, Something comes up again, from the ashes of my past it comes, to affect my present it comes, I in such situations always feel helpless, and my helplessness is all due to a dilemma, a dilemma that I face when something rebounds, It's like this situation in which, I feel that I can change the whole scenario, And I still don't.
I can let it go if I want to but somehow, I don't want to and that is what I do, I cling to it and try stopping what's not mine, what used to be mine but not now, Now maybe it belongs to someone else, Now maybe it wants to belong to someone else, I don't have any control over it, I never did, but the feeling which creeps inside me , Eats me. Kills me. Bit by bit.
I don't know what to do in such cases, How to react? and how to retract? How to feel? Is it a dream or is it real? I don't understand what to do? All I know seems ado, I try forgetting it as I think running is the best option I have, …

Locked behind.

If you're shut behind a door which has no key If you're left behind a in the dark with no light If you're left in the cold with no blanket no coat If you're left behind a wall with no hole If you're left in a cage which is Impregnable If you're left in the deep with no dream no morrrow For I feel that most of us would first struggle Struggle to break those doors and find that hole Struggle to find a way out of the darkness Out of that room which has them captured Some will keep trying all their lives and die trying Others will accept defeat and just sit aside crying Some will try killing themselves and die that ways The ones left will  go mad and act that ways Some will rise up and pray with their hands folded and eyes afraid The rest there will be none left  None doing nothing.

A million fireflies.

Shades of blue, Shades of the sky, Shadow of the trees, And a million fireflies.


The only thorns which hurt me, are the ones which don't get out, which don't leave my body, even when I shout. This photos is really amazing. i think it describes a lot of things in life. We always associate thorns with roses but here there aren't any roses. All that we have here are leaves blood red, Instead of those roses. Which is according to me the truth of life. You never do get roses, it's always the leaves and the thorns. Leaves indicate beauty too but they indicate it in more of that subtle way, for which you need to take a closer look. Open your eyes and open your mind.

A Subtle Rejection

I asked her once, She said she’ll let me know, I asked her again, She said she will, Let me know, The first time I knew it, She doesn’t want it, I understood that I don’t really fit, The parameters she wanted her guy to, And I genuinely don’t, It’s hard for me to blend into this crowd, It’s hard for me to live my life,
life like I want to live it, So I camouflage myself.

So just to satisfy my ego, I told myself, “She might have something”,  I asked her again, Just to re confirm, I got that vague reply, And I brought it home, I took it as a silent rejection, And it felt weird, Why? I don't know,
Coz I for the first time,
While knowing the outcome,
Did something stupid,
Went against my prudence,
Maybe just coz it felt right.

Whatsoever it was,
On giving it a deeper thought,
I realised that all I did,
Was just not to regret,
And now that sometime has passed,
I look back and relax,
I smile and watch her smiling,
In my thoughts and my mind.

Date Place.

I thought that one night, I’d take her out for dinner, Pick her up at eight, Take her to this place, It’s actually on a hill, Not a hill but a height, From where you can, Watch the night lights, The spot I chose, Is sober and its close, There is this small town, Right under our eyes, With the lights glimmering bright, This is what you see, If you look down, But when your life your head, And look up into the sky, You see those stars, Twinkling Blinking, As if looking at you, As if set they’re for you, The place on a whole, Is decent not bore, The moon lights the place, And the candle too.

You change the Universe.

Someone once told me "Each time you make a decision, each step you take, you change the universe". I laughed at it in the beginning, not understanding its meaning and said "Let's make love, let’s change the universe". At that time everything was a joke and so it remained for a very long time. Today, I realize what it meant.

As Einstein said "We live in parallel universes", I think it's true. Each time we make a decision we do something we want to, something which will have an effect. When we do something, sometimes before committing to that act we think and in that we time we think of all the scenarios that might take place due to that one decision. In those moments we should realize how important we are. How important is each decision that we make. How important is the whole idea of taking ONE single step.

I know, if we keep thinking about the repercussions of all those steps and decisions etc. we might as well not take any. But that again is on…

The Fire.

Moonlit Silver

It's a beautiful night, When you're working late, and suddenly you draw the curtains, you look outside, the same streets which you avoid, the same shops that you collide, the same roads jampact, the same buildings intact, stand there, still.
All you see is stillness, the night outside looks beautiful, and suddenly a street lamp flickers, you look at it closely, you realize that its going to die, and in the next second, a spark.
Now that there is no light,  on the street, now when there is no one, on the street, now when there is silence, on the street, and when you look up, you see the Moon.
The moon is beautiful, the stars shine bright, you look at them and want to go outside, but you still have some work, you want to feel the moonlight, you want to watch the stars, you want to make a wish, hoping you'd see a shooting star, you look at the clock, and notice that, the hands of the clock make an 'L', its three a.m.
You move out of your room, and then look at the mo…


Death. Life is so unpredictable, Life is so unfair, One moment you exist, In the other you’re not there, You have lunch with your friends, Have dinner with your girl, And one morning we all wake up, And see you’re not with us.
Life shifts from under your feet, You make a move, And then feel nothing, All of you that is left to us, Is just so much grief, All that is left to us, Are just memories, It’s a part of you that people live with, It’s a part of you that people see at, For whatever’s left of you, At the end of the day, Are just the things you did, And just memories.

The nature makes me wonder if I’m a part of it? or is it a part of me? Its beauty remains mesmerising. Always.

Middle Class Man.(2)

When we saw less of each other then I tried being okay with it. I got new friends too. Like a LOT many but I’m more of a ‘More on talking rather than actually going’ kind of person. So, I counted myself out on all of those trips to the bars and clubs.
Getting back to the girls. She was still the prettiest I had seen but as the new batch came the others in the town shifted their attention to this other girl who apparently had a brilliant ‘front and rare with a nice boot’.  (That was more of a code language)(actually not so well coded). But the new problem was that this girl was not the only one. People kept getting hotter and hotter by the day and guys kept flocking to the so called ‘sight-seeing’ places where you get to see the best. I kept low, I mean I was doing well as an al rounder but yes, with girls not much. Just casual talking and chit chat, sometimes food with their friends (who apparently were my friends too). I had some meals with that girl too (the old one I was talking ab…

Middle Class Man.(1)

Series of short stories.

I am a middle class man with my middle class life. I’m neither too rich not too poor but yes, I’m somewhere in the middle ‘Stuck’. Maybe not so ‘stuck’ but yes, I’m content. Like all to all it’s a pretty damn good life. Or I’d say it was.

So, the other day I saw this girl. (Yes, it all starts with a girl.)Pretty. Like really pretty. Went, talked to her. We became friends. So becoming friends was like a really good thing. Got to spend a lot of time with her but somewhat it increased the intensity of my ‘Likeness’ towards her. So, after sharing a couple of meals together, I tried gathering some courage to ask her out for Lunch/Dinner/Supper whatever you call it and we did go for it! It was a really good night with stars making patterns and the moon shining upon us. But (yes, there is always a but) It was good for her friends too coz apparently all of us went.*Sigh*

So, after a few days I thought of asking her out but I realized it is too early (although it wasn’t. …

A surge

I was walking by the street outside my house. I saw this glimmering sun, It was beautiful. I kept thinking about what is to be done today while looking at it. It was 6:37 am. I was out for a walk. I reached this place and sat down thinking how beautiful this nature can be. Each time I turned my head all I could notice was beauty. The plants starting to cast shadows, the street lamps dimming, the birds making that soulful chirrup. I couldn’t help but notice the fact that whatever was happening was so complex ad yet so simple. I kept staring at the amazing sky where the clouds were now making sense. A crab was crawling up my left, while a dog was howling on my right. It was all possible just by a simple look at those clouds. I was walking again now, I felt the cool breeze passing and then the wind started blowing. It took the clouds farther away and now a dragon had emerged out of them, with wings and flaring out that violent burst of fire from its pointed face. I could imagine riding i…


I don’t know what is happening. Things are moving way too fast. All of us have changed so much. We have started doing things which we always stood up against. The power of will is vanishing into the smoke (Metaphorical). We’ve all become tools. Yes, tools for one another. Earlier it was all about friendship and the bond that we shared but now, I am sure that its anything but the bond because when it was the bond we really didn’t talk . Life has become more of this monotonous race in which I’m running and you’re running and all the people around us are running. My teacher always asked me not to run that race. She always asked me to stand out. I somehow always did but now, I feel the whole idea of standing out and making a difference has vanished. It is not even about making a difference but it’s the stance you take. For the first time I am not able to take a stance. Find a reason. Motivation. Everything is just so dull, all hear is a lull. I've started calling life unfair. If I loo…


I get up from my bed, Its evening, I look outside the window, Smile at the stars, These stars look so beautiful,  I call you up, Ask you to come, Come meet me, You ask me to wait, I do.
I see you, You see me, You look at me, You look pretty, I still was thinking about the stars, But now it’s just you and Not the stars. We smile at each other, You giggle and I surrender, We talk, Time rolls by, Wind gushes through your hair, And I keep staring by.
You always know what to say, Those lips of yours curl away, You smile and then say, “What are you thinking about?” I say- “it’s you”, Coz we know it is true. We laugh at this thought, We talked and forgot.
You’re the best person I've got, We’re friends as we thought, The one to whom I talk, Lighten up and just walk, You do the same thing, Talk to me and sing, Our voices intermingle, Our thoughts do the jingle, We feel the chemistry, You know that its amazing, That's why we meet again and cling.
At the end of the day, I leave you at your bay, We remain the best of friends, Coz w…


Nature is something which I could never understand. Each time I looked around me I saw a different picture. I feel its a human just like you and me. I try capturing what all I could have in this tiny camera of mine but at the end of the day the gift of god is the eye.

A human is clay

All the people here,
with distinct faces and lives,
with their eyes on you,
and all around you,
not because you're important,
because you're a mortal,
waiting for that one mistake,
one mistake that will make you fall,
so will you rather never make one?
and live a life above the clouds,
or would you make some,
and jump from heaven,
to the ground?
I don't ask you,
to be perfect or wax,
all I ask you is a question about a fact,
would you rather be imperfect,
and flawed and broken,
or a trophy,
which shines and glows,
and makes people bow,
no matter what you choose,
I'll have one thing to say,
a trophy is a trophy,
and a human is clay.


And I don’t know what kinda joke is this? You play it on me, I let you play it. I laugh, I cry, I live, I die. I do so much, Yet it seems so less, To you, To me. I always had a thing for you, I told you I did, I don’t know. Maybe you’re not for me, Maybe I’m not for you. I don’t know who is for whom, What is for whom. All I know is that what I had, Has to go get buried. Yet again, Dead again.

As the lights roll by.

As the lights roll by, We Move away, From each other, and from ourselves, our friends become a part, of that little sorted past, out lies become our realities, and dreams become a tale, as we roll by, with tides going by, with wind passing through, our hair and brow, we change a lot, from a dot to a blot, we don’t know what changes us, all we know is that life calls it time.