A Subtle Rejection

I asked her once,
She said she’ll let me know,
I asked her again,
She said she will,
Let me know,
The first time I knew it,
She doesn’t want it,
I understood that I don’t really fit,
The parameters she wanted her guy to,
And I genuinely don’t,
It’s hard for me to blend into this crowd,
It’s hard for me to live my life,
life like I want to live it,
So I camouflage myself.

So just to satisfy my ego,
I told myself,
“She might have something”,
 I asked her again,
Just to re confirm,
I got that vague reply,
And I brought it home,
I took it as a silent rejection,
And it felt weird,
Why? I don't know,
Coz I for the first time,
While knowing the outcome,
Did something stupid,
Went against my prudence,
Maybe just coz it felt right.

Whatsoever it was,
On giving it a deeper thought,
I realised that all I did,
Was just not to regret,
And now that sometime has passed,
I look back and relax,
I smile and watch her smiling,
In my thoughts and my mind.


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