A Subtle Rejection

I asked her once,

She said she’ll let me know,

I asked her again,

She said she will,

Let me know,

The first time I knew it,

She doesn’t want it,

I understood that I don’t really fit,

The parameters she wanted her guy to,

And I genuinely don’t,

It’s hard for me to blend into this crowd,

It’s hard for me to live my life,
life like I want to live it,

So I camouflage myself.

So just to satisfy my ego,

I told myself,

“She might have something”,

I asked her again,

Just to re confirm,

I got that vague reply,

And I brought it home,

I took it as a silent rejection,

And it felt weird,

Why? I don't know,
Coz I for the first time,
While knowing the outcome,
Did something stupid,
Went against my prudence,
Maybe just coz it felt right.

Whatsoever it was,
On giving it a deeper thought,
I realised that all I did,
Was just not to regret,
And now that sometime has passed,
I look back and relax,
I smile and watch her smiling,
In my thoughts and my mind.

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