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That Part of my Past.

Each time I feel that everything has ended,
Something comes up again,
from the ashes of my past it comes,
to affect my present it comes,
I in such situations always feel helpless,
and my helplessness is all due to a dilemma,
a dilemma that I face when something rebounds,
It's like this situation in which,
I feel that I can change the whole scenario,
And I still don't.

I can let it go if I want to but somehow,
I don't want to and that is what I do,
I cling to it and try stopping what's not mine,
what used to be mine but not now,
Now maybe it belongs to someone else,
Now maybe it wants to belong to someone else,
I don't have any control over it,
I never did,
but the feeling which creeps inside me ,
Eats me. Kills me. Bit by bit.

I don't know what to do in such cases,
How to react? and how to retract?
How to feel? Is it a dream or is it real?
I don't understand what to do? All I know seems ado,
I try forgetting it as I think running is the best option I have,
But I've been running all my life,
from lies and truths and facts.

At the end I wait for it to subdue,
Subside below my skin,
I wait for the time this clarity goes off,
A hope which this act might have given birth,
I want all the things to get back to normal,
By normal I mean the situation in which,
I got over that part,
That part of my past.

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