Humans and fallacies.
At times you want to stay away from people, get away from things you might get attached to. That's mainly because you've either been hurt by someone or.. Well, there's no other reason generally. I keep thinking about this all the time, how to deal with people exactly, is staying away the solution or is it pretending to stay close? Or what? It is a very hard question for me to answer because I love humans. I love talking to people, knowing them, understanding and maybe helping them at some point. I wouldn't say that I'm too generous or saintly, no. I do it because as I said, I love humans. I learn from everyone I can and then move on, it is simple.
This seems easy to say. You meet someone, talk, shake hands, discuss a few ideas and after that you don't know where you are and where they will be. But no, this is a cycle. You talk to someone, you see the good or the bad in them, and decide what you have to do( I believe that all humans are inherently good, some (many) people don't believe in this and it is alright). If you like them, then you stay with them and become friends maybe. And that's exactly where is the turning point.
When you start strengthening your relationship with a person, your lives start entwining, you start losing your independence (not bad at all, and again loads of people might not agree to this) and this is when it all starts to change. I'm not saying it is bad, all I'm saying is that this is the point where the expectations and realities start coming out of the Pandoras box. You get to see the different sides of people, the ones which maybe you didn't want to or expect to. Slowly, your image of the friend starts melting downwards like glass and your friend starts becoming the "falling idol" in your head and you start becoming the one who seeing it all. I'm not saying it is true for one side, this is the same for your friend as well. And this is how relationships start going downhill, maybe.
In some cases, you don't see these glaring personality disfunctionalities and incompatibilities and start falling into love. At other times, you accept these and then start falling again. You accept their imperfections as beauty marks and start falling the same way. (Love here, refers to love in general. For a person, friend, partner, or maybe a soulmate). At other instances, you accept these and because the friend is a colleague or someone whom you feel that you owe something to and keep dealing with their shit. There are many more conditions but you would know them better, so I'll leave them up to you.
The point being, we meet people, we spend time with them, we get close to them. To some we remain friends for life, to one (or a few or none) we might get married, the rests are either washed away with the tides of time or are forgotten. What I'm trying to understand is, that is this all necessary? This is my question, that is this cycle necessary? I mean in the whole process you get hurt and you feel like this again and again. Should I stop this all together? And then because we're humans, we fall into the same pattern of friendship/love/loyalty/
dependencies. We have innumerable excuses to justify our fall and that how it is effecting us but no solution for the future.
For me, the solution would be to follow the saying, "Don't get too close, that you can't go away. Don't get so far, that you can't get back"
But if I follow what is the solution, will I still be human?