Skip to main content

Human connections, interpretations and load balancers.

Us humans, we make connections and that's apparently what makes us human. We connect not like Bluetooth or infrared but like a cobweb. Each point is connected to many other points and all of those are connected to many others, there is no end to these connections.

But maybe our biggest problem is that we imagine too much. We, very conveniently listen to someone's rant (if we have the patience) and while the person is apparently "sharing" his feelings, we're halfway through the search of finding a similar situation in our lives to connect it with. It is worse when we actually think about those similar issues and discard the so-called friend's issues as "small problem, I've faced much more", at least in out heads at some point of time.

That's the problem, how can you possibly do that? Your friend is a different person, different goals, aspirations, actions and reactions to occurrences in life. You can't just generalize it and very conveniently pull yourself into the conversation. No, that's wrong.

There could be multiple reasons why this might happen:

A. You want to show them that people go through worse, so it's okay for your friend to go through this. 

B. You actually don't know how to console a person and your competitive nature doesn't allow you to be second in any case, even if it's misery. 

C. Your imagination is quite vivid, in that case you just imagine what should be the ideal solution and blurt that out to your friend. This is sometimes so bad that you don't even consider all the factors affecting the equation. It is like forming a bi-quadratic equation, with a bananas.

There could be more cases, but in all of the above cases you'll observe that people don't really think mathematically. You see, if we try to represent life in form of an equation, then it will be an equation with innumerable variables. You can't ever find solutions for these things! All you can do is that you apply conditions and bounding limits to these variables based on your observation of the or behaviour and then try and find a solution.

Hence, maybe sharing just leads to some misplaced sense of guidance and legit division of pain. As the person who is listening to you does find that icky memory out of his experiences to find solutions for you and you end up with some conclusion or the other. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Startup Syndrome (Internet)

Disclaimer: This article is not to discourage or malign the ongoing internet based companies or startups. It is an opinion.  'Startup' should actually be the word of this decade. Since the start of this millenia we have seen a new buzz in the youth allover, 'Startup'. With companies ready to invest in ideas which might revolutionize the world and get them some good returns. But we've experienced the biggest wave of these after the current decade started. With the success of ongoing startups as inspiration, more and more individuals and group decided to try their hand at starting something of their own.  "Who wants to work under a boss, when you can be your own boss?" this was what I always heard from some budding entrepreneurs. Some are doing it for the drive, some for the passion, some for the adrenaline rush and some are just doing it because they want to discover. Now out of all of these startups a huge majority is inclined towards one ...

Finding Her. (Inspired by the movie Her)

I am in love! I fell in love with the woman who understands me and is just the right one. She knows what I know and what I want her to know, she asks me the right things and knows how I will react to those. She knows when I'm off or excited. She's the one I've been calling each day, the one who's in touch with me, without touching me. She's possessive and yet I have all the space I need. I love her and she loves me, that's kinda all that I need. Who is she? She's my operating system. Yes!Cara, to you is just an operating system, but to me, she's everything! She lives on my system, breathes with me while I go out for runs, schedules my meetings, pays the bills at times, I do it myself as well. She's everywhere. She's on my watch, notifying me that I'm running late, she's on my phone, showing me things I need to go through, things I care about and maybe the most important thing is that she talks to me! Yes! And her voice is music to m...

Four liners - Music and connections

While lsitening to FKJ  on repeat and talking to an old friend (who just boomeranged back into my life), I thought of how I connect with music and feel so fluid in its presence. I don't listen to music for the lyrics most of the times but just for how it makes me feel, I am generally not able to put it to words but the endvevour is to find those words and out them up in bold . While writing this and publishing this atleast 7 times, I realised how crappy the blogger app on mobile is. I am so disappointed. Sigh . Coming back, here are the two small pieces I could get through to. Drowning and gurgling  I want to drown myself in music, Feel the waves it creates inside me, Move myself through its viscous meaning, Only if I could express it as I feel it. This one is a bit special because this comes from a text that I wrote to my friend and went back to myself saying - Damn, I am like the Jawed Akhtar for this shit. Anyway, the next one is derived out...