Times when everything just keeeeps moving south, without any sense of stopping or even taking short breaks of happiness in between. That's kinda where my life lies right now. I am slowly realizing that what I thought was the definition of hard is may not be enough to spell out the word correctly. These are the moments when your outlook towards your life becomes really biased. You either stop looking at all the good things that have ever happened to you and keep spiraling into the sulk cycle, which directly leads you to the conclusion that you were the : NOT SO CHOSEN ONE or you keep looking at the past and keep wishing to go back to it. In this case, you over glorify your past and end up with the conclusion that maybe you have made all wrong decisions in your life, all of which have led you to this doom.
Well, I do these things alternatively and end up pretty messed up in both the scenarios. This state mostly makes me feel like a fish on a plate, with some water till the plate's rim. The fish just keeps on wriggling its way to suffocation on the plate and things actually just become more and more screwed up.
Need to stop being the fish and be water. The good things about being water is that, you support life, you are THE life and you mould yourself to whatever you want to be. You're just a full time actor and life support for a lot of other people. The good thing about other people + (a lot of) work is that you get distracted (escape routes), which actually helps you runaway for a while. Helping me quite a lot.
Also, good thing is that I know all of this in my head so I just tend to read/work more in order to distract myself. Let's hope things change soon, yeah?
P.S- I know the illustration might seem pretty bad, but hey a man's gotta do what he's gotta do.